LT

L is an emotion that can consume a person at anytime whether it is toward a person or thing. T is a battle field that contains L and is best friends with T.

Have you figured out what L and T are? * cues Jeopardy music*

Alright times up what was you guess was it Love and Trust? That would be an amazing guess, but not quite. ,

L stands for Lust and T stands for Temptation.

For a while now I have been battling with lustful thoughts and actions. It is easy to lust after someone or something without being aware of that lust, but fortunately I am aware of it, but the problem is how to deal with it.

I don't act on my lust which is good I guess, but the feelings remain and they are strong. It is hard because temptation is always around the corner.

The Bible tells us that we can't serve two masters because you will always love one more than the other. I am currently serving two masters and I am not hugging God as closely as I should. I am consciously serving the devil and because I have done it so long, when it has come to my lust, that I no longer see a problem with it.

However, I know there is a problem, no matter how desensitized I have become to that inner voice, I know something is wrong.

Maybe pride should be added because I put myself in situations just to see whether I would fall or not and I always fall because I am not spiritually strong.

This is the first time I have admitted how spiritually weak I am. I am not strong enough in my spirituality, rather than elevate I am dissenting in my spiritual warfare.

I call God father, but I don't do as he asks, heed his messages, take his advice, or follow his rules, I can give everyone else biblical advice, yet I cannot apply it to my life.

I could boast how this new year will be different and stuff, but I truly hope it will be a year where I can truly struggle and try to find my spiritual center. Lust, although it feels good, isn't a friend of mine, but an enemy.

I have to be the one to deprogram myself in many ways and not just every new year, but maybe every 6 months.

Pray for me and pray with me, its going to be an uphill battler that hopefully my father will forgive me and acknowledge my trying.

Dealing with Hurtful People

There are always people who make you want to back hand them. Sometimes even punch them because they feel as though they can talk to people however they want and still be treated with kindness. News flash its not that kind of party.

But its important to shake your head at them. There is no need to become violent with them it is enough to take them for face value and treat them as such. I know this message is contradicting to how Jesus treated his traitors especially Judas.

The Lord knew that Judas would give him to his enemies for a bag of coins, but he continued to break bread with him, Jesus never turned his back on him or sneered at him. But one thing that is certain is that Jesus was hurt deeply.

On my journey to do what is right I find it hard to deal with people who hurt me. I refuse do deal with people that want to hurt me, so I keep them at arms length in every way possible. I am not the type of person that can turn my emotions on and off; its one or the other. I either feel indifferent toward you or I care about you there is rarely an in between when it comes to me.

It has been said that the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference and I believe that because whether you love someone or hate them, emotions are involved, but when you are indifferent to someone there is a lack of emotion toward that person, you can hurt them without caring as to how they will feel about it. When you don't care about someone than you write that person off and rarely look back.

This is the way I usually deal with people, I emotionally cut them off from me. I can do this without a second thought and once I have done it, its hard to undo it; maybe that's why I'm trying hard not to do it, but old habits are a struggle to break.

Hopefully God will help me to work on this habit of mine, since he is the only one that can cause change. For now until I achieve it, I will simply keep people at arm length and give them a blank stare when they question why I am not close with them.